“Put first things first and we get second things thrown in. Put second things first and we lose both first and second things.” –C.S. Lewis
This is easy in theory and difficult in practice. The seasons of my life when I struggle in vain are a result of my disregard to this concept. It is rare when I am not uncentered in my priorities.
Theory vs. Practice
When I was young, I wanted to fit in with friends. When I was in high school, I wanted to get good grades and make my parents proud. When I was in college I wanted to be pursued by a boy, and when I graduated, desperation hit a new high to get a job and money.
Once a job was attained, and quickly discovered to be pointless, my desire re-routed toward relationship, career and family.
As it turns out, I am quite superficial. I conjecture most of us are. I don’t often serve others and when I do, it’s because that other is in some way linked to me, which transitively remains self-serving.
The interesting part is that while self-centeredness can certainly make one selfish and rude, more often it has the effect of making one moral and upright. There is no better way to satisfy a strong desire to feel good about oneself than by being a respectable person.
But behaving lawfully for the sake of feeling good about oneself remains, at its root, selfish.
Us vs. Them?
Are we helping people for their sake or our own? Am I genuinely considering the unique needs of my patient, my classmate and my neighbor, or am I serving them so I might prove my own self-worth?
This is a focal point of Saint Augustine and many early philosophers, who captured the futile plight of humans to earn our worthiness through secondary pursuits, even good ones, by saying, “Our hearts were made for you, O Lord, and they are restless, until they rest in you.”
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